Quotes

Since today is Saturday, I am going to be vair vair comique, and give you special quotes. Quotes that will make you laugh (or cry, depending on the stupidity of the quote). Quotes which, taken out of context, may be some of the funniest things you have heard. And you will wonder what on earth made someone say that. "I think that's my pen." "I know, I'm just wrapping it." "Glitter is the herpes of arts and crafts." "Harry can fondle Ginny's hair." "Ginny would be like 'what are you doing?'" "Well, they would have to be multi-tasking or else it's weird." "Sophie's masterpiece is the rectangular donut hole of the donut." "Let's just put stalking strategies and what-not." "Would it mess up how we live if the planets did a congo line?" "Why is your retainer on the leaning tower of Pisa again?" "The other day in Spanish I saw someone mysteriously walking around with a fan." "What do you mean? mermaids always fly!" "Getting a sticker at home is an honor code violation. It's falsifying official documents." I will save the rest for later. I know you're confused, and that's okay. So am I. And I heard them in context.

A Fitting Intro for My Cat

I have a beautiful calico cat named Fiona. Hers is an interesting(ish) tale. We used to feed her about eight times what she should get, so she was overweight. She is now on a diet and has lost said weight. But she still loves to eat; it's her favorite pasttime (also lounging around the house on what I suppose she presumes are her chairs). She is currently sitting in her usual spot behind the computer (This keeps her warm). It is her dinnertime now, and I am awaiting the onslaught of meows. This is why we feed her--she shuts up afterwards. Well, and we love her. But that is why we feed her on time. Fiona seems quite content. She's even stretching. Now she's kneading my face with her paws. And--there's the meowing. I am being beseeched, what with all the patting and whimpering and such. But that is her way (she also enjoys doing birdcalls at the feathered ones out the window). Fiona chose to sleep in a shoebox with her special blanket which she used to routinely attempt to milk (Caution: this may induce 'aww'ing). I'm not particularly sure what to think about Fiona, other than 'aww, she's so cute!'. I once heard that cats had a sixth sense; they sensed who was uncomfortable with them, then sat in their laps. I wonder...

Wonderful!

The word 'wonderful' is so often misused. In everyone's mind, wonderful is equivalent to great. The only problem with this, is that we have no other word quite like it. This word, when broken apart, is Full of Wonder. In the dictionary, it is defined as "of a sort that causes or arouses wonder". Wonder is "something strange and surprising". So if we use wonderful as synonymous to great, we lose a word. We lose a word to describe all the moments we are struck by the beauty of something. We lose a word to explain exactly what kind of amazing something is. We lose a word to define all those moments of innocent curiousity and childlike awe that sweeten the world. We forget a word that brings to life the beautiful, wide-eyed feeling when we see something magnificent and new to us. This is what Wonderful feels like.

Beginning

This is a blog short enough to fit into your coffee break. It is a collection of commentaries on things I find interesting. These blurbs are not necessarily serious. It is actually more likely that they will be silly, curious, or contemplative. One of my favorite things to write about are literalisms. Literalisms are expressions, such as 'you're driving me crazy', that we do not think of in the literal sense but are quite amusing when we do. Try visualizing the example. It's ridiculous, isn't it? But I like to ponder and hopefully you do too.