Quotes

Since today is Saturday, I am going to be vair vair comique, and give you special quotes. Quotes that will make you laugh (or cry, depending on the stupidity of the quote). Quotes which, taken out of context, may be some of the funniest things you have heard. And you will wonder what on earth made someone say that. "I think that's my pen." "I know, I'm just wrapping it." "Glitter is the herpes of arts and crafts." "Harry can fondle Ginny's hair." "Ginny would be like 'what are you doing?'" "Well, they would have to be multi-tasking or else it's weird." "Sophie's masterpiece is the rectangular donut hole of the donut." "Let's just put stalking strategies and what-not." "Would it mess up how we live if the planets did a congo line?" "Why is your retainer on the leaning tower of Pisa again?" "The other day in Spanish I saw someone mysteriously walking around with a fan." "What do you mean? mermaids always fly!" "Getting a sticker at home is an honor code violation. It's falsifying official documents." I will save the rest for later. I know you're confused, and that's okay. So am I. And I heard them in context.